Semi-Final LFR Mumblings: What Have We Learned?

That being in an anonymous group of 25 ass-hats makes people become ass-hats? No no no.

Think back to the release of 4.3, what was the glossy cover-up to the dreadful yet beloved tool we now know as LFR? To let people “experience” content just like the raiders and get the same type of “epic loot” as the “raiders”. Right? That LFR will be a step to raiding to show “regular” folk how raids work and how various mechanics must be handled by the group.

Uhhh wait one moment Mr. Postman, what mechanics?

Morchok – stand and kill
Zonzonn – stand and kill
That Other One – Stand and kill then kill one slime and continue killing. In LFR it is almost irrelevant which slime dies and if all three remain up it is totally healable.
Hagara – Stay out of ICE, not fire, then run around.
Ultraxion – Push a button that’s not part of your own set of abilities.
Blackhorn – Stack on a circle and kill.
Spine – Go AFK and wait until the plate blasts off.
Madness – Kill all the things!

Now it’s true that many people get to see “the raid” but they don’t actually get to “do” the raid. This is where the infamous Cata Heroics comes into play. Remember those annoying yet fun dungeons? Pretty much EVERY single boss had some sort of wipe/danger mechanic and required the entire group to activate their brains. Then we had the Zandalaris, those were just takara-esque. They were both brutal and required high throughput from every member of the team. If it’s raid mechanics you want, you have your entire slop of training material hidden away in the 346 tier. Heck I believe those annoying trash who level themselves up have caused more wipes than Morchok on all three of his difficulties combined! (Sorry Morchok we love (killing) you).

In conclusion, each boss in LFR should give 55 VP rather than having to wait to the end boss for the entire 250. This could solve a lot of loot anguish. You didn’t win that one token that the shaman who already had the 397 won? Well, shove this little bit of VP up your ass and shut-up and hope for the best at the next boss! At the very least you got SOMETHING. (I know, total topic change!)

Turby the Learned Nothing

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